Koko kertomus
Javier begins with questions. He has attended retreats before and sometimes feels as though he is returning to the same journey. The previous evening, that thought had frightened him a little: would he go through the same thing again? Would he be able to stay in the room? He does not describe an experience that has suddenly become perfectly clear. He is trying to understand what repeats, with the words he has.
But he also describes another way of being present that evening. He was looking at the group, each person in their own place. Even after a poor night's sleep, he wanted to be there. He thanks the people around him and the team. He says he felt well integrated. Alongside the worry, there is this simple fact: he wanted to stay with them.
As he listens to others speak about energy, Javier notices that he does not feel it in the same way. He wonders whether he works more through his mind. He does not try to make his account resemble anyone else's. His questions remain. He recognises the differences while wondering whether, each in their own way, they might also be talking about something shared.
Then he widens what he calls the journey. He speaks about the conversation happening now, integration, what will happen tomorrow and the day after. About moments they can also enjoy. In his words, we hear a shift in attention: from the question of repeating the same ceremony towards being here with others, and towards the life that continues afterwards. He does not need to settle every question to say that this encounter mattered. That morning, he keeps his questions and thanks the group in which he found his place.
What Javier describes is his experience alone. Every person's journey is different. Thank you for listening. This was Ayahuasca Stories.
